Absinthe is legal and here’s how you purchase, prepare, and consume it.

Absinthe: The Guide to Getting, Preparing, and Drinking Absinthe : College Drinker

Absinthe is legal in the United states but due to the freshness of this shit’s legality, it’s going to take some time before you can buy some quality shit.  If you can find the 90% absinthe made with wormwood, you can be sure you’re going to end up getting pretty fucked up.  As far as the hallucinations, that really is a 300 lb. tranny lying next to you and your bed. And yes, you fucked her/him. HAHA! Absinthe just gave you AIDS!